Security. What Does It Mean To You?

 Security. We know the word. It is defined in the Merriam-Webster dictionary as follows:

security

noun

se·​cu·​ri·​ty si-ˈkyu̇r-ə-tē  

-ˈkyər-

pluralsecurities

Synonyms of security

1

: the quality or state of being secure: such as

a

: freedom from danger : SAFETY

b

: freedom from fear or anxiety

c

: freedom from the prospect of being laid off

job security

2

a

: something given, deposited, or pledged to make certain the fulfillment of an obligation

b

: SURETY

3

: an instrument of investment in the form of a document (such as a stock certificate or bond) providing evidence of its ownership

4

a

: something that secures : PROTECTION

b(1)

: measures taken to guard against espionage or sabotage, crime, attack, or escape

(2)

: an organization or department whose task is security

5

: the state of being able to reliably afford or access what is needed to meet one's basic needs

But, what does it mean to you? Have you really taken a look at your life and decided what it means to have security? What kind of security are you seeking?

As I age, I find myself aligning with most every definition listed above. I have decided that I haven't secured my future well enough and definition number 5 is of the greatest concern to me, followed backwards numerically in importance. We (I will refer to this word as my husband and I for now) are absolutely not secure in any way. We are drowning in insecurity right now; financially and basic needs/food security. I feel that this is due to a number of reasons, some of which I cannot control, most I can and should be at this very moment.

I have made this decision to become more secure in all aspects, but have frankly been lazy and stood in my own way. I have legitimate reasons for having those insecurities, but I also have no good reason for being lazy about finding workarounds to attain those security goals. It all comes down to being proactive, reactive or inactive; I have made far more use of the last two throughout my life. I have made so many excuses for why I can't reach my goals and never really found a way to make them attainable via another path. 

The revelations come to us usually in the midst of a crisis or stressful situation that has put us into a reactive mode because we've procrastinated. Being in a constant reactive mode eventually causes depression because when we never attain the full benefit of a positive outcome, we end up exhausted and then become inactive until another crisis and start the cycle all over again. There is no security to be had.

Example: I have known for years that we are food insecure. I try to do things like buy extra when I can, grow as much as possible in my garden, raise chickens for eggs. But, I plan out a very large garden and go overboard on buying seeds for said garden, get seeds started germinating and growing, ready the massive garden for planting seedlings, get them in the ground; then disaster strikes. I have weather issues, physical health issues; life. I cannot physically keep up with the weeding and nurturing. Harvests are meager at best due to lack of sufficient input from me, and even then I don't get it processed and preserved, thusly becoming fodder for my compost pile. This creates more food insecurity and financially, living on a very fixed income, becomes yet another round of crisis mode, leading to depression, inactivity and procrastination, and ultimately reactive mode again. See? I've recognized the cycle, right? 

Why, then, do we not fix our own cycle? Why do we continue to follow these crazy patterns and run around like a hamster on a wheel? How are we ever going to gain security in anything we do in life if we don't break that cycle, get off that hamster wheel and find some sort of workaround that actually benefits us? The answer, my friends, lies within. We need to learn how to gain control of our minds, get out of our comfort zones to seek our own truths and abilities, and to just find a way to be proactive; to improvise, adapt and overcome.

I have recently started to really assess our homestead and our businesses. It is my goal to get our businesses profitable within two years and this homestead abundantly productive by next year. This creates more financial and food security in the end. The first steps that I'm taking is to clear out the clutter that is in my mind and home and reclaim productive zones again. I'm reorganizing my seeds, resetting my front porch growing room, as well as my crafting/sewing/all purpose office.

I do believe that to gain our personally defined security starts with getting rid of the clutter and excess and get organized. This includes our minds, so we can see our patterns of behavior. All of that excess prohibits productivity and effectiveness in our overall objective, so clearing the clutter is necessary. We can all be successful in this endeavor by searching from within and just starting.

Blessings to all. Live from the Earth. Play in the dirt.

  

Welcome 2022; or not.

 How did you ring in 2022? To say that it was no more lackluster than 2020 or 2021, would be a gross understatement, in my opinion. I try to enter each new year with a list of goals at the ready and a spark in my enthusiasm to make this year better and more productive than any of the previous years; somehow it will be 'the best year yet!'. Here we are, just getting through the first full week of January 2022, and I'm fizzling out already. How about you?

I was reluctant and hesitated, really, to sit down around Thanksgiving, to write out what I was thankful for. I mean, why do we do that, anyway? Shouldn't we be thankful every single day for any experiences we encounter or the people that we have in our lives? Why do we need to take a month or day out of each year to count those blessings and be thankful for everything? I find it a bit daunting and useless, frankly. Here's why.

We take 20 seconds of every single day for less than a full month each year to post on our social media accounts what we're thankful for. Then, immediately after waking from that food and turkey coma on the 4th Thursday every November, we do stupid things like crowd stores at midnight for the best Black Friday deals and we truly have no concern for our fellow human being. Most everyone is rude, pushy, angry, tired and just a plain jerk when they don't get whatever it was they were looking for in each store, whatever it may be, or someone has just been all of those things to you or around you, so you're now doing it to someone else. So, are you really thankful, or are you using it as a convenient excuse?

Then, we purchase more stuff we don't need, to replace that feeling of importance and thankfulness that we had just a mere few hours prior. Hypocritical, don't you think? Why do you need all of this? It's a vast amount of clutter of things that we don't truly need, that will end up broken, forgotten or re-gifted to the next unsuspecting schmuck sometime throughout the next year, or sent to the landfill or thrift store, anyway.

Then, the holiday rush of December. Oh, how wondrous the lights, trees, decorations, pretty gift wrapping tied with amazing ribbon, that the gifter spent so much time and effort on (and let's face it, probably dropped a pretty penny on, because; inflation), only to be ripped to shreds and tossed into the landfill to rot for the next umpteen years. Then, the gifts themselves. Oh, the gifts.

You probably ended up with that courtesy basket of bath goods because the gifter had no idea what to actually purchase for you, because, while they're thankful that you're in their life in the previous month, it is more likely that they don't really know you or your likes or dislikes, anyway. So, you end up with a bunch of smelly stuff that you will never use. It's probably going to end up being re-gifted or donated, or just sit in a closet, collecting dust. Ask me how I know this.

Then, we enter the new year. Oh, the hopes and resolutions; the goals, the drive to make it an amazing new year; profitable or productive in some way. You've probably made the same resolutions that 90% or more people make every single New Year's Eve; you're going to lose weight, exercise, eat healthy, take better care of yourself, or a whole slew of other resolutions and promises that you know you aren't going to keep. I'm no exception in partaking in this wild scheme. This is why I no longer make resolutions. This is why I make a list of goals I'd like to accomplish throughout the following year; and I usually sit down in mid-December to start writing those down.

You see, I have a notebook full of ideas, thoughts, feelings and goals I would like to accomplish throughout a year. I add and delete those goals on almost the daily throughout a year. Why? I'll tell you. 

My goals change throughout the year, depending on how things work out financially and most often, depending on my physical health and capabilities, which lead to my mental and emotional status changes throughout a year. Goals, like resolutions, promises, wants; they change throughout a year. Your health status (or someone that you're close to) may change for the better or may take a downward turn because of things out of your control. These types of situations then create the necessity to modify your goals for a year. 

You may have to change the direction in which you're going throughout a year. What if you experience a traumatic emotional or physical event and can't complete that promise that you made not only yourself, but another or many others? Well, then you've ceased to be able to follow through and complete that promise, letting yourself and others down, which puts you into a precarious situation on an emotional and mental level and a relationship level. 

In the end, you truly don't have full control over outside circumstances that may alter or nullify those promises, resolutions or goals that you have set forth. So, wouldn't it be better to just make your resolution to promise to try to be better than you were last year and to try many things, instead of setting yourself and others up for failure with only one goal? Maybe that's all you can handle, is one, but I think that depending on the type of goals you are setting, you can accomplish more than one.

I encourage people to make a list of goals for a year. Start with something as silly as maybe making sure you brush your teeth or hair at the very least twice daily, or the garbage goes out every single night, the dishes get done and put away immediately after a meal, or something very mundane. Add more goals, going up in effort, until you reach a really lofty goal, of say, reducing or paying off all of your debt, building something, getting a certification in something; a goal to work really hard towards, but if you can't reach it fully or find that it isn't going to work out like you'd planned, you can change course, modify or delete it altogether.

I have a list of literally 100 goals to date. I just keep adding and deleting or modifying each one when necessary. This goals list never goes away, but it changes frequently, and sometimes daily, and it carries into the next year. I use the method of scheduling; hourly, daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly, every 6 months and yearly. It helps me to stay on track, as best as I can, but I also don't get upset and act too harshly on myself, if I cannot complete those schedules as laid out. I have health issues, family issues, city issues and homesteading issues that need to take precedence, sometimes. 

I truly hope that you can use some of my thoughts to help improve your 2022 and keep yourself on track to accomplishing your goals. Live a more simple life. Lose the clutter. Lose the competition to have more "stuff" than your neighbor and just learn to be a kind neighbor, friend; human. That's probably the biggest and most important goal for every single day; kindness.

Live from the Earth. Play in the dirt.

Blessings 

Celebrating our birthday when we start to get to a 'certain age'.

February is my birth month. I'm of that 'certain age', where birthdays really have become just another day, nothing special, I don't really expect (or necessarily want) a lot of fan-fair. Remember when you were a kid and your birthday was this huge event that your parents went all out for? They buy you something that you have wanted for so long and had asked for at the holiday season, but knew that because you had siblings, that your only chance to actually receive that extra special gift was on your birthday? Remember the parties, the cake and ice cream, or special tradition that you always had that was unique to you and your special day? Why, then, if birthdays are such a special occasion, do we not really celebrate them as an adult? 

I honestly quit celebrating my birthdays around the time that my kids started being born, mostly because it was more important to me that my kids and husband had their special day recognized. Then, my husbands birthdays started to not really be as celebrated, either, because it was more important to us both that our children's special days were recognized over our own. That's just something we do as parents, right? To be honest, after hitting the age of 21 and hitting all of those major legal milestones, I really didn't care much about celebrating my birthdays. So, what I've started to do, is just find ways to celebrate little things throughout a year. 

This year, I'm compiling a list of 45 things for my 45th year. I'm doing little things throughout the year (45 of them) to celebrate my 45th trip around the sun. You can certainly make these things large or small; categorize them as major goals to accomplish like buying yourself something extravagant or as little as making it a habit to take one full hour out of your day, to sit and reflect, relax, drink some coffee or wine; really, something as simple as that. Maybe you want to make a specific day as an at home spa day, where you take a long hot bath, paint your fingers and toes, put on a face and hair mask and just pamper yourself once a week or month. The possibilities are absolutely endless. It's all up to you.

Maybe this is the year that you have that extra special day. The party with your family and friends, the night out, the cake and ice cream, the extravagant gift; a day all about you, for you, even if it has to be done by you. Maybe your significant other or child(ren) can plan it all out for you, just tell them what you really want for your special day. Most people do not possess the ability to read minds, so this would be helpful for them to actually carry out a plan. And, you'll probably get exactly what you want or at least really close.

Stay in and have a Zoom party. Make it a social video conferencing celebration. Have some wine together. Laugh together. Talk about dreams and goals in your life. We are in what people are calling a pandemic, of course, so this could be a much safer option for you and those you care about, by staying in and drinking that bottle of something you've been saving for such a special occasion. Everyone stays home, no one drives, everyone stays safe. It seems like a win all the way around.

If things ever open again this year, maybe you can take a vacation. Is there a place that you've always dreamed of going? Make plans to get there! What about a vineyard and wine tasting trip? It may even be as simple as a day of shopping with the girls or the family. A nice dinner out. There are other fun things you can try, like an escape room party, if you have a birthday in the warmer months, an amusement park to relive your childhood a bit and act like a kid again. 

Indoor go-carting is super fun! And, typically not too taxing on the pocketbook. If you can have a designated driver, a pub/brewery crawl can be a fun thing to do, and some of them even have the pub bike that you can rent for a certain price per hour. Those are fun with a group of your pals! Are you adventurous? Maybe zip lining or kayaking, taking a hike in the wilderness to reconnect your spirit and soul with our beautiful Mother Earth is more your idea of fun. 

Learning a new skill throughout your birthday year. Teach yourself something new from an absolute beginners viewpoint. I have a goal of learning my acoustic guitar this year and how to repair small engines on my own. I know nothing about small engines or mechanical work in general, so this is completely out of my wheelhouse and I'm excited to start trying this.

Music a passion? Learn to play an instrument. A piano, guitar, woodwind, string, percussion, brass; the possibilities are endless. You can usually find a quality used instrument that doesn't cost a ton of money to start out with on places like Craigslist, Facebook Marketplace or even a local music store or pawn shop. I received an antique piano for free about 6 or 7 years ago. I am setting a goal to learn how to fix it, tune it and play it this year. I'm starting to really notice a pattern here, that music (as it always has been) an extremely important part of my life. I've always been a singer, so I'm going to start to practice getting my form and sound back, to go along with learning new instruments.

I have an older model jukebox that was my grandparents, that as a child, it was one of the things that we did together; listen to 45's for hours on end, as we sat out on the front porch, playing record after record, working in the flower beds. Well, the years and several moves have taken it's toll on that wonderful memory, and it is in need of repair. So, I'm purchasing the repair manual for it and I'm going to attempt to fix it myself. Yet one more skill that I want to teach myself in my 45th year of life.

So, know that your birthday is special. It was the day that you entered this world of beauty and opportunity, abundance and love. Your day is still special. It was the day that the world gained an amazing, caring, loving and capable human being; you. Enjoy your birthday the way that you want to enjoy it. It is truly all about you.

Live from the Earth. Play in the dirt.

Blessings,

Nonnie  

Time for you. Time for me. Let's start planning our garden time.

January is such a tough time. We're in the throws of Winter, and while it can be an absolutely beautiful time of year, it often can be calming or start building anxiety; especially when you live in a much colder climate. I start counting down the days when I can start my seeds in mass quantities and place them on my grow racks and under grow lights. I long for the ability to get my hands and bare feet into the earth and reconnect and reenergize my life source and thusly, my soul.

I typically take the month of January to plan out my gardens, continue to order larger and larger quantities of seed every month until about April or May and then start ordering root starts, trees, fruit bushes and the like from May until August, then start the winter garden veggie order about August/September and bulbs in September through November. It's truly a system I have. I love to attempt to save as much seed from what I grow to harvest, and I'm kind of a seed hoarder, to be honest. It's one of those things that I don't think you can ever have enough of. I do start cold stratification of certain seeds in about mid January, so that I have viable seedlings to plant in about March into seed flats and pots, then into the yard and garden they go come Mother's Day weekend. 

I'm very methodical, to say the least. I have set a goal this year, to convert my front enclosed south-facing porch into a year-round greenhouse of sorts, and that will be very interesting, if nothing else. Oh, the satisfaction I get from being able to play in the dirt throughout the entirety of the year, even if it is a mixture of my composting pile and seed starting mix. The energy is nothing short of amazing, that you receive from having your hands in soil. The plans for the indoor greenhouse have already begun and I have drywall pieces that I have salvaged, and will be picking up some insulation this Saturday, to replace what is in the walls now. The existing windows will be reset and resealed and new hardware will be place for them and an exhaust fan and heat ducting will be placed in the ceiling to ensure the proper environment for growing. Yes. I've done my planning and research, to say the least. 

What are your plans for January? Do you take this month to do seed and supplies inventory? Do you plan out your garden(s)and food forests like I do? Or do you just take this month to recoup and gather your thoughts and plans? I'd love to hear what you have planned! 

Happy planning!

Live from the Earth. Play in the dirt.

Blessings,

Nonnie

This is Sparta! Well, in spirit, anyway (as it pertains to me).

Welcome to 2021. The year that will tell the previous one, "Hold my beer and watch this!" This is already a strange and upsetting year for a lot of people, including myself. I feel that life as I once knew it, is over and a new era of self exploration, heartache, laughs, tears and growth can and will occur. It hasn't started out putting it's best foot forward, but I'm sure going to try to put forth all of my efforts to put my best foot forward. I have goals; many goals. Some very lofty ones, sure, but I have many. I have a fire in my soul and a newfound sense of drive. I have plans in place for varying scenarios, and backup plans for those plans, if they don't come out just as I have anticipated. I will not be deterred from the end game.

I don't know about others in the country or the world, but for the first time in a very long time, I'm truly concerned for the future. I fear that the worst is yet to come and I can honestly say that I'm not prepared. Are you? I have a lot riding on success this year in many aspects of my life, including family, business ventures, outside relationships, finances and so many more, that may seem quite trivial to some, but I see the writing on the wall and I don't like it. This is where the fire starts to rage and fuels that drive for me.

Healthy skepticism and being a realist is what I like to call what I'm feeling and thinking. Most would simply call me a conspiracy theorist, and to some degree, sure; I could appear that way. But, I am trusting my 'gut feelings' about things and trusting my own thoughts, beliefs and actions a whole lot more these days and those who do not feel the way I do; well, their opinions are obviously not going to sway me from my trajectory of success and survival. Sure, I value the opinions of those that I love and trust, but, I'm still going to listen to my intuition, trust what I'm feeling and just go with it.

So, I'm turning things around with this blog, my social media, my businesses, and all of the other outside things in my life, to build success and reap those benefits. You will see change in the appearance of my life and how it is portrayed or presented to the public. These changes will not be overly dramatic, I don't think, but you will see the shift, I'm sure. Some of the more noticeable changes will be in the presentation on my social media. This blog will still be little life lessons I learn on my journey, but there will be more informative content on ways to help others through that same life lesson and ways to make your life a lot less stressful and a lot more fun. I hope that you enjoy the direction I wish to take it. 

Live from the Earth. Play in the dirt.

Blessings,

Nonnie 

Is it possible? Am I turning a corner?

Hello, my lovelies. It has been 10 days since my last entry. So much for posting a blog every day for the month of September, right? Things have just not been good for me on a mental or emotional level. This morning, however, I have started to turn a corner, I think. Maybe only slightly, but it's a start for what I hope is going to prove beneficial for me.

Today is Sunday, September 27, 2020. It's not particularly different from any other fall Sunday; it's a bit dreary and overcast, a few sprinkles fall from the sky here and there, but, on a mental and emotional level, something feels a bit different. Could it be that clarity and some form of enlightenment is creeping in? We are in the pre-retrograde shadow of Mercury turning retrograde, and, if you aren't familiar with what Mercury turning retrograde is, I suggest that you do some research on it, on your own accord. Astrology is one of the many tools I use to guide my spiritual life.

So, what is it, then, about today, that is so different? I really can't put my finger on it. I slept in, I don't have more or less pain than usual (unless you count the building migraine due to the low pressure system coming in), but I do feel a bit more put-together, if you will; productive, a bit of clarity, maybe. I have been struggling greatly with things this year, on a mental, emotional and even physical level, so this is an odd feeling to me.

Perhaps I am entering into this pre-retrograde like I should. It is a good time for reflection, re-doing things and thinking ahead for a much better game plan, so to speak, about major decisions. It's not a good time for making those decisions come to fruition. So, for the period of about September 23rd through November 4th, I will be reviewing most of the things in my life, re-thinking how to actually change some things and re-doing a lot of those past things that didn't quite work out as planned. I will also be doing some silly things like buying an external hard drive to back up my desk top, laptop and phone, if you catch my drift.

I'm very much thinking of how to change up the formatting of my blog, social media and YouTube channels, as I feel that these things are very stagnant and I don't seem to have a lot of forward movement. This could also be why I haven't kept to the scheduling of all of these things (except for the YouTube daily vlogging commitment), and have kind of fallen off the wagon, so to speak. It just hasn't been working out the way that I had anticipated or wanted it to. So, back to the reviewing and re-thinking, so that I can re-do this aspect and hopefully make it much more successful.

My mental health has been all over the place, lately. I'm up, I'm down. I'm high and low. Manic and depressed. I am very much fluctuating in my emotions and ways of thinking over the last month. I've had those moments of despair and hopelessness; days, even. It truly is maddening. I feel as though I'm truly deserving of an insane asylum at times. But, today is different. I don't feel as though I need to be in that asylum, but maybe I have some clarity and possibly a bit of enlightenment. Things can change; they are changing. I'm hoping, for the better.

On October 1st, I will be watching all of my Depression Chronicles series on my YouTube channel, my social media and reading over this blog to review my thoughts, re-think those patterns and re-do some of the actions that I have taken during this month of mental health evaluation. I'll write a blog and make a video for my channel with these findings and hopefully, it will not only help my own mental health, but my greatest hope is to help someone else.

Remember that you are not alone.

Live from the Earth. Play in the dirt.

Blessings